This tunnel to the subterranean region of Hell known to cognoscenti as Plokk has been indecorously concealed behind copious gobs of cement, which look like a pile of diarrhea. Located in an alley called Larch Street near the AMC Theater on Van Ness Avenue, it is meant to protect movie-goers from the fate of a number of small children who disappeared on the way home after a matinee showing of an early Harry Potter film some years ago.
A sign near the tunnel entrance showed an arrow next to the words "Chamber of Secrets" and enticed them to enter. Lamentably, no waving of wands or casting of spells or invisible cloaks could save the little ones from their horrible fate. Nor was any Dumbledore present to hear their screams as they were impaled and roasted upon glowing red spits in the loathsome barbecue grills of Plokk.
And just HOW do YOU know this, sir? What secret sources of knowledge are you privy to?
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